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The eldest child in the family
Содержание книги
- The causes of the bad appetite
- The anorexia is the disease both long and serious, and to avoid it or slow down at the early stage of the development, the parents shall control their kids closely.
- Do not insist upon the fact that he absolutely ate, move the plate away from him. He will eat everything indeed during the supper.
- If the kid actively rejects any dishes, don ’ t force him to eat, and take, so to speak, a time-out. After some time, the baby likely to return to the old preferences.
- In the use of the dolls to form the persistent interest in kid to the meal, as in everything, you should know the measure.
- When the child is sick and cannot explain what hurts him, he begins to cry from the pain, capricious, refuses to eat, sleeps restlessly.
- Sometimes the baby , on the contrary, is capricious because he wants to sleep, but cannot sleep. Pamper him, caress him, make a relaxing massage. Stay with him and try to set the sleep ing to him.
- Do not load the baby with what he is not interested. Try to find out his preferences and choose the appropriate occupation. Give him the right to choose, the right to decide for himself what to do.
- What age do children’s fears arise at and what is the baby afraid?
- The fears, where did they come from?
- You must be able to distinguish between the nightmares and the night terrors, because they have the different causes.
- The night terrors occur in many children, but in healthy ones they occur infrequently. If the fears continue for many nights in a row – this is an excuse to visit a doctor.
- The program for the neutralization of children’s fears
- If the baby does not work, help him. And remember the main fear that torments the child, and use it in the story being composed.
- The reaction on the parental prohibition
- Should you indulge his whims?
- During the moods and the tantrums the behavior of the parents should be based on three principles: try to understand, indicate the limits of the acceptable behavior and show compassion.
- How to distract the child from the whims
- Remember even the best game should not be prolonged, only then it will interest and cheer the child.
- How to respond to the disobedience
- About the physical punishment
- Do not punish the child in a hurry, first try to “cool down”, calm down, analyze the depth of the action, choosing an adequate punishment.
- The punishment is fair and effective
- If the child does not get along with his brother or his sister
- The eldest child in the family
- The position of the average child in the family
- One of the most effective methods of influencing the child is the personal example of the parents. As you will behave, so your children will treat each other.
- The communication with the adults and the contacts with the peers should constantly alternate, because the children are united not only with the same age, but also with the common interests.
- No less effective are psychological trainings that are presented to the baby in the form of the game. In the game, the child is liberated; it is exactly in it he learns the most necessary easily.
- If it is difficult for the child to make the friends
- Do not worry if the child inserts the wrong word that you expected. This can make the game even more interesting and fun, especially if the guys come up with several answers.
- Is it necessary the child to go to the kindergarten
- Why does not the child want to go to the kindergarten.
- The children can bear the dislike to the certain dishes for the kindergarten generally. The children are not able to explain why this has happened.
- The adults, maybe, should talk to the caregiver about the tablemate of the baby. The cause can be in fact that they speak something offended for your child.
The first child completely belonged to all your love in the family for some time. As a result, when he has his brother or his sister, he inevitably becomes jealous. The jealousy can already manifest itself during the mother’s pregnancy. When the younger child grows up, it can cause the quarrels between the children.
The older one wants to go back to those times very much when all the love and the affection belonged to him, when he enjoyed the advantages that have passed to the younger one now. His behavior begins to be dominated with either the sadness or the aggression.
You sometimes can hear from the elder children these words: “we must throw him out!”, “We need to get him back.”
How to behave with the older child in such the cases?
Explain to him that the adults tend to take more care of the younger kids because they are still helpless, but this does not mean that your attitude has changed towards him that is you still love him and will always love him.
Teach the older one to take care of the younger one. Be sure to praise him for his care and help, so that he does not regret his efforts. And do not forget that even though the younger child takes a lot of your attention, you should not neglect the older one.
The youngest child
The younger kid is not as jealous as the older one in the family, because he is already bathed in the love and the affection. But he can also have a reason for jealousy, which will lead to the quarrel between the children then.
The jealousy, as a rule, arises from the envy that is the younger child is jealous of everything that the older one can already do, and he cannot yet do. He will do everything for the fact that to be on a par with the older one, who is perceived as an obstacle on the way to the goal. I know not many cases when the relationship between the children was formed in this way.
Not so long ago, I was approached by the parents of four-years-old Sasha and five-years-old Andrew. When the youngest son was born, Andrew was jealous a little, because everyone’s attention switched to Sasha. But soon he starts helping his parents very much to take care of his brother. However, as soon as the youngest one grew up, the problems began that is the boys who got along with each other suddenly broke loose. As soon as the parents turned away, the quarrels broke out immediately. They usually ended the fact that Sasha was running to complain about his “bad” older brother. In addition, he did not miss an opportunity any ever to once again say that Andrew had done something illegal, even if this did not concern him personally. At the same time, he often boasted of his success. The bragging was clearly excessive, but the parents forgave it to their favorite. Andrew also changed not for the better that is he became restless, hot-tempered, some kind of nervous and began to conflict with his younger brother. The adults could not understand the reasons what was happening. In fact, as it turned out to be quite simple.
The younger one, believing that he had less the rights than the older one, was eager to grow up as soon as possible so that he could get the same advantages as the older one. At the same time, he wanted to keep a privileged position in the family very much to remain the youngest favourite, which everyone spoiled.
Do not rush to scold the younger child for the quarrels with his brother or his sister. Understand that he is plagued with the contradictions that are on the one hand, he wants to grow up quickly and enjoys the same advantages as the older child; on the other hand, he is afraid that, as an adult, he will lose the parental love.
Let him know that you are glad to see how he is growing that you are happy with his success; explain that as he gets older, he will not lose your love.
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