Stating likes, dislikes and preferences

Read the text and do exercises given after it.

Everybody knows that the British have an overriding respect for the privacy of other people and are convinced of the people’s likes and dislikes being their own concern and nobody else’s. So, they generally avoid stating likes, dislikes and preferences 68

 

in a straightforward way, but rather use polite, tentative and pleasant techniques instead. It’s important to choose appropriate ways of saying things

according to the situation you’re in, the relationships you have with the

people you are talking to; the mood of the people you are talking to. It

should be mentioned that in formal situations the British use more direct

ways of expressing likes, dislikes, preferences. Notice that the grammatical

negative “I don’t like …” sounds too strong and dogmatic. The following

expressions may be used instead:

“I don’t particularly like …, etc.” If the British are in formal terms with

somebody, they state their likes as that: “Personally, I find it extremely

interesting/ quite enjoyable/rather good.”

Expressing their emotions, such as pleasure, for example, the British

say: “I’m rather/quite keen on pets (having pets).” “I enjoy this music/

reading historical books.”

When the British want to express their affection for somebody or

something, they usually use such phrases as: “I’m rather / very fond of

ballet/ listening to the rock, etc.”

If the British agree with likes they can say: “So do / did / am I, actually.” “Oh, yes, I am / do / did too. It’s great / enjoyable / fantastic /

useful, etc.,

isn’t it?” The latter one is considered to be informal.

If the British disagree with likes, they say like that: “Oh, do you? /

really? / are you? which is supposed to be rather direct. If the British want

to be polite, they find it more suitable to say: “I must say it’s not something I know much about.” “I’m not particularly keen on hiking.” Being direct in expressing dislikes you can use: “I (really) don’t like staying

at home, etc.” Very blunt is the phrase “I can’t stand horror films, etc.”

For expressing an agreement with dislikes the following forms can

be used: “Neither / Nor am / can / do I (actually).” “Yes, it’s awful /

terrible, etc., isn’t it?” “(Yes,) I would tend to agree with you here.”

Preferences: 69

 

Sometimes you need to state a preference when someone makes a

suggestion, offers something or asks your opinion about what to do. Often

people are asking for your opinion and you can state your preference

freely, other times, people have made an offer and you need to state a preference politely if you do not want to do what has been suggested, or would

rather do something else.

The British often use words like “prefer, would prefer, would rather” to talk or ask about preferences: “I prefer living on my own”

“Would you prefer to see a movie or go to a club?” “Would you rather

go shopping with me?”

Those expressions are quite different in meaning and this is why

learners of English often find them challenging. So here is how we can

separate them. We tend to use “prefer” to talk generally about “likes, dislikes, what we want”. For example, “He prefers reading books.” “I prefer

going to the beach than going to a swimming pool.” The expressions

“would prefer” and “would rather” are a little more specific. Both are

used to talk about preference at the moment of speaking and both are used

to show preference when there is more than one option available at the

moment of speaking.

At the same time there is some difference between them; they can be

followed by different parts of speech. “I would rather” must be followed

by a base verb. For example, “I would rather eat sushi tonight.” “I would

prefer” can be followed by an infinitive (“I would prefer to eat sushi”), a

gerund (“I would prefer eating sushi”) or a noun (“I would prefer sushi”)

 

DIALOGUES

Note the expressions used in the dialogue and the progression of the conversation. The dialogue can be used as a model to have similar conversations.

 

1. Cindy: John, where are the cookies? Don’t tell me you ate them all!

Again!

John: Yes, I did. I couldn’t help it. They were so good. 70

 

Cindy: I thought you didn’t like cookies.

John: Well, I don’t like cookies flavored with chocolate at all. But vanilla

is different. I love them to death.

Cindy: Huh, I didn’t know that.

John: Well, vanilla cookies taste even better with a glass of cold milk.

 

2. Mother: I wonder what we should have for dinner.

Daughter: Are you asking me?

Mother: Yes, I am. I really don’t feel much like cooking, but the family

must it.

Daughter: Well, you know me. I can always eat pizza or spaghetti.

Mother: So, I’ve noticed. You’ve putting on a little weight, aren’t you?

Daughter: I know. Don’t remind me! I’m starting a new diet day after tomorrow.

 

3. A: Look! These jackets are nice. Which one do you like better?

B: I like the wool one better.

A: Really? Why?

B: It looks warmer.

A: Well, I prefer the leather one. It’s more attractive than the wool one.

B: Hmm… There’s no price tag.

A: Excuse me. How much is this jacket?

C: It’s $99. Would you like to try it on?

A: Oh, no. That’s OK! But thank you anyway.

C: You’re welcome.

 

4. A: Do you want any meat today, Mrs.Brown?

B: Yes, please.

A: Do you want beef or lamb? The lamb is very good today.

B: Beef, please. I like lamb, but my husband doesn’t.

A: What about some steak? This is a very nice piece.

B: Give me this piece, please. And a pound of mince, too.

A: Do you want a chicken. They are fresh and nice. Not fat at all.

B: No, thank you. My children don’t like chicken.

A: To tell you the truth, Mrs Brown, I don’t like chicken either. 71

 

5. A: What is your favorite pastime, Boris?

B: Fishing. I enjoy fishing very much.

A: Do you often go fishing?

B: Well, yes. I make it a point of spending a few hours by the river every

weekend.

A: Do you usually catch much?

B: Well, it depends. Last Sunday, for instance, I caught so much fish that

my wife cooked a fish dish for the whole family.

 

6. A: I hate watching TV. It’s such a waste of time, and most of the programs are quite boring.

B: Really? I love TV. I watch quite a lot for relaxation – and I’ve learnt

quite a lot from TV, too.

7. James: What kind of music do you like, Susan?

Susan: I’m partial to classic music. What about you?

James: I like jazz and 50’s and 60’s rock and roll.

Susan: What is your favorite kind of food?

James: Mexican food, without a doubt. What’s yours?

Susan: I don’t really have a favorite. I like all kinds of food, except Thai

food. It’s too spicy for me.

James: Who is your favorite movie star?

Susan: Brad Pitt, he is so handsome. Who do you like?

James: My favorite actor is Sean Connery and my favorite actress is Jody

Foster.

Susan: What sport do you like to play best?

James: I really like to play golf, but I’m not very good at it. What about

you?

Susan: I don’t really like sports and have never played them. I like games

though.

James: What’s your favorite game?

Susan: Don’t laugh, but it’s tiddlywinks.

James: Tiddlywinks! That’s a kid’s game.

Susan: I know, but I’m very good at it. I play with my nephews and nieces

and I beat them every time.

Susan: Never. 72

 

8. Betty: Where shall we go for our vocation this year, Ted?

Ted: How about Florida? It’s cheap, and good weather is guaranteed.

Betty: I’d rather do something more exciting this year. Have you seen this

ad for adventure holidays in Canada?

Ted: I prefer lying on a beach to hang-gliding and canoeing.

Betty: But we do that every year. I’d prefer to do something different this

time. I’d rather not go anywhere so crowded.

Ted: Well, you have a point. Palm Beach was very crowded last time. I’d

prefer somewhere a little quieter too, but I don’t fancy anything too active.

Betty: How about Crystal Bay? The weather’s usually good and there are

some lovely walks around the coast.

Ted: Sounds OK to me. Would you prefer to stay in a hotel or rent a cottage?

 

EXERCISES

I. Read the conversation and answer the questions given below.

Ray: So we’ll have it on the 10

th

then. Good. But now, about the music for

the party. Any ideas?

Kate: Well, why not have live music? There’re lots of groups around. We

can ask “The Spiders”- you know, the group who plays at the local disco

from time to time.

Steve: No, thanks, Kate! I can’t stand them or their music!

Ray: Nor me. And anyway, they don’t exactly play the sort of music you

can dance to, do they?

Kate: No, I suppose not.

Steve: How do you feel about having records, as we did last year? Most

people seemed to quite like it.

Ray: Well, we could, I suppose, Steve, but I think most of us would prefer

live music.

Kate: Yes, I agree – especially since we only had about ten records all together.

 

Questions:

1. What arrangements are the speakers discussing? 2. How do Kate, Steve

and Ray express their likes and dislikes in music (formally or informally)? 73

 

3. What language do the speakers use making their suggestions? 4. What

language do the speakers use expressing their attitude to their friends’ suggestions?

 

II. Read the conversation and answer the questions given below.

A: I tend to be rather keen on ballet myself.

B: Oh, yes. So do I. And I’m particularly interested in modern dance.

A: Oh, really? I’m afraid it’s not something I know very well about. You

see I’m not so keen on this abstract type of dancing though it’s in fashion

nowadays.

B: Oh, aren’t you? I know some people don’t like it very much but personally I find it fascinating.

 

Questions:

1. Do you think the speakers are on equal terms? Prove your opinion.

2. What language does the first speaker use to express his likes and dislikes? 3. In what way does the second speaker express his liking for modern dance? 4. What else could the second speaker have said with the same

meaning?

III. Look through this mini-dialogue and answer the questions given below.

John: Do you feel like going to Alan’s party on Friday?

Ann: No, not really. I’d prefer to go somewhere a bit more exciting. What

about you?

John: Oh, I’m easy. I’ll do whatever you decide.

 

Questions:

1. What language shows that the speakers are on equal terms? 2. Does John

sound formally? 3. What else could John have said with the same meaning? 4. Does Ann state her preference politely?

 

IV. Read the conversation and answer the questions given below.

Tom: Shall we have some soup first?

Nick: No, thank you. I don’t like soup. I’d rather have some fruit juice to

start with. 74

 

Tom: Ok. And what about the main course? Which would you rather have,

fish or meat?

Nick: Meat, I think.

Tom: Don’t you like fish, then?

Nick: I do, but I prefer meat.

Tom: Shall we have some white wine?

Nick: I’d rather have red wine with meat.

Tom: What would you like for dessert? Some cheese?

Nick: I’d rather have a coffee, I think.

Tom: Fine. And … er, after dinner? Shall we go to a disco?

Nick: No, thanks, I’d rather go straight home.

 

Questions:

1. How do the speakers sound (formal or informal)? 2. Does Tom’s suggestion sound polite? 3. What else could Tom have said with the same

meaning and the same degree of politeness? 4. In what way does Nick decline Tom’s suggestion? What else could he have said with the same

meaning? 5. How does Nick state his preference?

V. Make the following into the sentences of likes and dislikes.

1. I, rather keen, going to cartoon films. 2. Science-fiction films, rather

boring. 3. I, not find, watching television, very interesting. 4. I, not keen,

watching documentaries. 5. Personally, (don’t) find, documentaries, very

enjoyable. 6. I, can’t stand, detective films. 7. I, not over keen, watching,

children films. 8. I, can’t stand, people, smoking in cinemas. 9. I, think,

documentaries, more interesting, than musicals.

 

VI. Replace formal phrases with informal ones.

1. I don’t really like football, either. 2. I must admit I don’t like classical

music all that much. 3. No, I don’t think that’s such a good idea, really. 4. I

must say, I tend to be quite keen on ballet. 5. Personally, I think traveling

on trains is rather boring. 6. Well, to be honest, I find thrillers really enjoyable. 7. I must say I don’t really have preferences, both sound equally good

for me. 8. I’m quite happy to accept whichever place is decided upon?

9. Might I suggest going out this evening? 75

 

VII. Replace the informal phrases with formal ones:

1. Do you fancy going to the cinema? 2. Not me. 3. I can’t stand pop music. 4. How about next Monday? 5. Oh, I’m easy, you know. 6. Well, I’m

not all that keen, actually. 7. Yes, me too. 8. No, thanks. 9. Where do you

feel like having dinner? 10. Yes, that’s an idea, I think. 11. How about next

Sunday?

 

VIII. Respond to the following expressions using one of the variant given

below:

1. What do you think of jazz? 2. How do you like soccer? 3. Which do you

prefer: ice-cream or candy? 4. Do you like apples? 5. What is your favorite

food? 6. Would you like a cup of coffee?

Responses: No, not really. My favorite food is Korean food. I can’t stand

it. It’s so-so. I think it’s a boring game. I prefer ice-cream. Actually, I don’t

like either, I prefer yogurt. Yes, I love them. I’m crazy about watching it,

but not playing.

 

IX. Make up short conversations in the following situations. State your

likes and dislikes to your partner about the subjects given, and they agree

or disagree.

Basketball, reading, TV soaps, eating pizza, exercise, watching news, blind

dates, going to class, romance movies, French food, R&B music, watching

boxing, travelling, studying, ping pong, playing chess.

 

X. Express your likes and dislikes in the following situations:

1. At a movie and you can’t stand the violence. Try to convince your

partner to leave the movie because you don’t like it.

2. At a restaurant and the food is terrible. You are eating a hamburger,

French fries, and chocolate ice cream. The waiter comes by and asks

how the food is. Tell him/her why you dislike it.

3. In English class and the teacher is lecturing about grammar. Tell

your partner why you dislike lectures on Grammar.

4. At home and you just opened a birthday present that you really hate.

Your partner is the family member who gave you the present. Tell

him/her why you like the present even though you don’t. 76

 

5. You are talking to a fellow-student. She/he is expressing her/his dislike of modern fashions. Express your strong disagreement.

6. You and a friend of yours have decided to learn another foreign language. State your preferences and ask for his/hers.

 

UNIT 10

Opinions

Read the text and do exercises given after it.

Whenever we wish to express our opinion in

English, most of the times we use the phrase

“I think...” to introduce our ideas. Nothing wrong with it. The only problem is that we tend to abuse this expression and, consequently, we sometimes hear people using ”I think...” six, eight, ten times in a very short period of time like the oral exam. One of the factors that influences the final marks in the oral exam is the variety of structures and richness of vocabulary students use.

There is a great number of phrases used for expressing opinion.

Some words about the most popular phrase “in smb’s point of view /

opinion”.

The British would normally drop “point of” and simply say “in

his/her/my/their view (opinion):

Examples:

1) In my view, birds should not be kept in cages.

2) - How important is it, in your view, that the twins should stay together?

- In my opinion, it's very important.

If the British want to use “point of view”, they would more often say”

from my point of view” rather than “ according to my point of view”.

Both these expressions emphasize the position or angle you are judging the

situation from: 77

 

Examples:

1) From my point of view it makes no difference whether you return on

Saturday night or Sunday morning.

2) From a political point of view, the agreement of the UN is extremely

important.

3) From the point of view of safety, always wear a helmet when you are

on the building site.

“In my view”,” from my point of view”, “in my opinion” are all fairly formal ways of expressing your opinion characteristic of written English.

Note: In spoken English the structure “from my point of view” is usually

avoided by the British. They use “from somebody's point of view” to express someone's ideas from their position in life (as a student, as a housewife, as a doctor, as a Catholic). But personal opinions are not introduced

by this structure. Compare: In my opinion, war is always wrong. He

wrote about the war from the point of view of an ordinary soldier.

In my view, it's a very good school. You have to judge a school from

the child's point of view.

Less formal equivalents more characteristic of spoken English, include

the following:

“to my mind”: to emphasize that this is your opinion

“reckon”: usually to express an opinion about what is likely to happen

“feel”: to express a strong personal opinion

“if you ask me”: to express an opinion that may be critical

“to be honest (with you)”: to express a critical opinion without seeming

rude

“as far as I'm concerned”: to express an opinion that may be different

from others' 78

 

Examples:

1) To my mind the quality of their football is just not good enough.

2) I reckon it'll rain later today. Let's go tomorrow.

3) I feel she shouldn't be getting married so young.

4) If you ask me, it's unreasonable to pay for something which should

be free.

5) To be honest (with you), I'm surprised you got into university with

such low grades.

6) As far as I'm concerned, the matter is over and done with and we can

now move forward.

If you are required to write an academic essay in which you are

asked to express an opinion (see below), useful alternatives to” in my

view” include: “I think that…” “It seems to me that…” “I would argue

that…” “I do not believe that…” “I am unconvinced that…” “I do not

agree that…”

For example:

A: How acceptable is it for wild animals to be kept in zoos?

B: I believe that it is quite unacceptable for animals to be kept in zoos. It

seems to me that when they are confined to a cage they never have enough

room to move around. I would argue that it is kinder to allow a rare animal

to die naturally in the wilds rather than to prolong its life artificially in a

zoo.

To achieve balance in any essay, it may be useful to incorporate

opinions that are different from your own.

Useful linking words and expressions include:

“Of course, many / some people argue…” “It is sometimes argued…”

“Admittedly…” “While…”

For example:

“It is sometimes argued that it is possible for conditions in the zoo to replicate the wild animal's natural habitat. While this may be feasible for

smaller reptiles, it will never be possible, in my view, for the larger mammals which needs acres of space to roam around in.” 79

 

It may sometimes be necessary to explain a thought in greater detail.

Useful linking expressions for doing this include: “By this I mean…”

“Here I'm referring to…” “To be more precise…” “That is to say…”

For example:

“By spending money on confining wild animals to zoos, we are wasting resources. By this I mean there are more urgent economic problems to

deal with: hospitals and schools should be our first priority.’” Below are

some phrases that can be used to help express opinions. Some of these

phrases are more appropriate for written English such as giving your opinion in an essay whereas some can also be used in spoken English.”

Words and phrases to express a personal point of view:

“In my experience…” “As far as I'm concerned…” “Speaking for myself…” “In my opinion…” “Personally, I think…” “I'd say that…”

“I'd suggest that…” “I'd like to point out that…” “I believe that…”

“What I mean is…”

We use these words and phrases to express a point of view that is generally

thought by people:

“It is thought that...” “ Some people say that...” “It is considered...” “It

is generally accepted that...”

We use these words and phrases to agree with someone else's point of

view: “Of course.” “You're absolutely right.” “Yes, I agree.” “I think

so too.” “That's a good point.” “Exactly.” “I don't think so either.”

“So do I.” “I'd go along with that.” “That's true.” “Neither do I.” “I

agree with you entirely.” “That's just what I was thinking.” “I couldn't agree more.”

We use these words and phrases to disagree with someone else's point of

view: “That's different.” “I don't agree with you.” “However…”

“That's not entirely true.” “On the contrary…” “I'm sorry to disagree

with you, but…” “Yes, but don't you think…” “That's not the same

thing at all.” “I'm afraid I have to disagree.” “I'm not so sure about

that.” “I must take issue with you on that.” “It's unjustifiable to say

that...”

Notice: The British generally use elaborate and roundabout ways to express disagreement. And they say that in a tentative and polite way. 80

 

DIALOGUES

Note the expressions used in the dialogue and the progression of the conversation. The dialogue can be used as a model to have similar conversations.

 

1. Ann: It’s, time for high tea.

Elisabeth: So early? Six o’clock or thereabouts is high tea time.

Anne: What? Tea, sandwiches and cakes at 6 o’clock? That’s a surely far

too late.

Elisabeth: No, no. I think you’re mixing up high tea and afternoon tea.

Anne: Aren’t they the same?

Elisabeth: No, not at all. Afternoon tea means tea, perhaps sandwiches and

definitely cakes around 4.

Anne: What’s high tea then?

Elisabeth: That’s a proper meal, often with meat or fish, but also of course

with tea to drink.

 

2. Eddie: What are the chances of getting a raise this year?

Janice: I’m convinced that the chances are slim.

Eddie: Wow! You haven’t got a raise for how many years now?

Janice: It’s been three years! The company keeps losing money, and they

can’t afford to give anyone a raise.

Eddie: If you ask me, I would look for another job.

 

3. Diane: Hey, Terry? How’s it going?

Terri: Not too great. I’m really stressed out.

Diane: Oh?

Terri: Yeah, it seems to me that school gives me hives. See?

Diane: Oh, my Gosh! Your are is full of bumps! What did the doctor say?

Terri: He said to relax and take a break.

Diane: I reckon, it’s a good recommendation. 81

 

4. Alicia: You look run down, Brian.

Brian: Yeah. I’ve been feeling under the weather recently. I caught a bad

cold last week, and I still haven’t gotten over it.

Alicia: I think you must take sick leave.

Brien: I’m quite agree with you. I really need a good rest.

 

5. Rod: You’re in great shape, Keith. Do you work out at a gym?

Keith: Yeah, I do. I guess I’m a real fitness freak.

Rod: So, how often do you work out?

Keith: Well, I do aerobics every day after work. And then I play badminton.

Rod: I like badminton, too.

Keith: In my opinion everybody should go in for sport.

Rod: It is sometimes argued that sport is helpful for everybody.

 

6. Janet: We never used to have weather like we have these days.

Sadie: There doesn’t seem to be any stability any more. It’s cold when you

expect it to be warm and warm when you expect it to be cold.

Janet: They say it’s a lot to do with the greenhouse effect.

Sadie: I’ve heard about that. It is thought that it comes from all the carbon

gases we’re putting into the atmosphere.

 

EXERCISES

I. Read the conversation and answer the questions given below.

Sally: Brian, you’ve seen “Star Wars”, haven’t you?

Brian: That’s right.

Sally: What did you think of it?

Brian: Well, I was a bit disappointed, really, I didn’t think it was a particularly good film at all. 82

 

Claire: Oh, I disagree, Brian! I thought it was great! It’s one of the best

films I’ve seen. Don’t you think so, Peter?

Peter: Yes, I agree up to a point. It was good … I enjoyed it … but, to be

honest, it was as good as I thought it would be …

Brian: That’s exactly how I felt. If you ask me, it was just one big publicity

stunt from start to finish.

Claire: Oh, that’s rubbish, Brian! You’re the first person I’ve met who

hasn’t enjoyed the film.

Brian: Perhaps I am … but Sally asked me for my opinion, and as far as

I’m concerned it was pretty boring.

Peter: Ah … I’m not so sure I’d agree with you there, Brian. I don’t see

how you can say it was boring.

Claire: Neither do I. It was full of excitement! All the way through!

Brian: In my opinion it wasn’t. I was bored … mainly because I was expecting so much more to happen, I suppose.

Claire: Oh, come on! A lot happened!

Peter: I agree with you, Brian, about expecting a lot more to happen.

Claire: Oh, you are both talking nonsense! Don’t listen to them, Sally. Believe me, it’s really exciting – you’ll love every minute of it. In fact, why

don’t you and I go and see it tomorrow?

Sally: But you’ve already seen it!

Claire: So what? This is the film I’d gladly see again. And enjoy it just as

much, too!

 

Questions:

1. Does Brian feel strongly about the film? 2. How does Brian put his opinion? 3. Does Claire strongly disagree with Brian? 4. How does Peter express his agreement with Claire’s opinion? 5. What’s Claire’s opinion of

the film? What reasons does she give to support (justify) her opinion?

II. Make up mini-dialogues about opinions using the Model:

Model: A. what, think, pop music? B: it, very good, my opinion.

A: What do you think of pop music?

B: In my opinion it’s very good. 83

 

1. A. how, feel, a new play, in the theatre? B. it, marvelous, enjoy every

minute of it, as far as I’m concerned. 2. A. what, opinion, is, modern

painting? B. the way I see it, just fantastic. 3. A. I, wondering, you, stand,

question, the proposal, for a new supermarket, in your district? B. it, a

waste of money, from my point of view. 4. A. what, opinion, this, painting? B. it, really, quite, interesting, as far as, I’m able, to judge. 5. A. how,

feel, personally, life, in large cities? B. city life, very enjoyable, if, you,

want, my opinion. 6. A. what, think, school uniform? B. the way I see it,

school uniform, a useful thing, wearing uniform, strengthen, discipline at

school.

 

III. Express your opinion about the following statements. Explain your

point of view. Try to use as many different phrases as possible.

1. Computer is the greatest invention of the twentieth century. 2. Education

is a responsibility of parents. 3. Marriages should be performed in the

church. 4. To be an advanced student you must work hard. 5. The

knowledge of grammar rules don’t help you to speak English. 6. The more

words you know the more fluently you’ll be able to speak. 7. Time is money. 8. You learn much more from newspapers than books. 9.No news is

good news. 10.Life is what you make of it.

 

IV. Fill in missing words.

1. … my mind the quality of these products is not high enough. 2. I must

take issue … you … that. 3. As far as I’m …, I’m always ready to help.

4. … my opinion we shouldn’t attend this lecture. 5. Speaking … myself,

I would have done it beforehand. 6. “I think I don’t want to stay here anymore”. – “ … do I”. 7. … his point …view it’s impossible. 8. I’d like to

point … that smoking here is prohibited.

 

V. Make short conversations in the following situations:

1. A friend of yours and you are talking about traffic problems in the city

you live. Ask for your friend’s opinion about the solution of these problems. 84

 

2. Your sister is a student. She has met a young man who proposed to her.

She loves him too but she wants to complete the university before marriage. She wants to know your opinion.

3. Your friend who is 19 years old wants to move out of his/her parents’

home. He/She has a job and thinks that he/she can support himself/herself.

Your friend’s parents do not approve of his/her intention. Give your opinion.

4. Your cousin and you are discussing a successful marriage and what exactly makes it happy. Your opinions on the role of a woman and a man in

the family are quite different.

5. A fellow-student of yours and you are discussing the importance of selfinstruction. He/She thinks that it encourages learners to take on greater responsibility for their own learning. Give your opinion.

 

UNIT 11

Annoyance and anger

 

Read the text and do exercises given after it.

The British have the reputation of being

reserved people. If they find themselves in

situations that irritate them they usually try to keep themselves in check.

Generally when they are annoyed they express their irritation in a rather

apologetic way. As a matter of fact, they expect the same social behavior

from other nations as well. So, if you don’t want to give the impression of

being rude when expressing annoyance in English you should use set

phrases of annoyance in appropriate situations.

Most of the time people don’t deliberately try to do things that annoy

others, so when you ask someone to change their behavior, they may react

by being confused, or genuinely surprised.

1. This initial reaction may be followed by automatically denying that anything’s wrong with their behavior and by becoming angry.

2. It’s important to hear the person out if they have these reactions rather

than to immediately come on stronger with your assertive message. 85

 

When you ask someone to change long–standing habits, be aware

that habits are hard to change and that people don’t change overnight.

- Asking for smaller changes, giving a reasonable length of time for

them to occur, and supporting the person’s efforts will make it more likely

that your assertiveness will result in positive change.

Some people tell themselves, “If I really am their friend, I should accept their behavior.”

- Friendships do overlook some behaviors, but it does not mean accepting mistreatment.

- Not expressing yourself can hurt friendships and requesting behavior changes is constructive when it’s motivated out of the desire to improve

the relationship and done in a caring and sensitive manner.

Annoyance and anger are not bad emotions or destructive in themselves.

Their potential destructiveness lies in how they are expressed. Aggressively expressed anger attacks others’ self-esteem and can be destructive, but

assertively expressed anger lets others know what your feelings, wants, and

frustrations are and gives them a chance to change their behavior. Harboring irritated feelings does not deal with the problem situation and makes

the irritation likely to grow.

When you assertively express anger, you are using your energy to

deal with the situation, to clear the air, and to arrive at an understanding.

Understandings may include finding out that the other person meant no

harm or that you jumped to a wrong conclusion. Feeling angry doesn’t

make you right. Other people don’t have the job of making you feel better.

The source of your feelings is inside of you.

You’re responsible for taking care of your feelings. Others may choose to

change their behavior, but they don’t have to just because you have a feeling.

There are some guidelines for expressing Anger/Annoyance

- Use the statements in which you simply state what you want. 86

 

Anger about watching TV instead of going out can be stated as, for example, “I very much want to get out of the house this weekend.” “This is

the third time I’ve called about being billed for a phone call I didn’t

make and I’m getting very irritated.” This statement expresses your

feelings directly and lets others know your limits.

If you want to express your feelings tentatively you may do it like

that: “This is the second time this week you’ve cancelled our lunch

date. I’m really disappointed because I’ve been looking forward to

seeing you and I’m a little irritated because I’m starting to wonder

about our friendship.”

The following examples are considered to be empathic: “I realize

you’ve got strong opinions about divorce and are entitled to your opinion and I object to the way you’re stereotyping divorced people. I

have not found divorced people to be particularly unstable and definitely not immoral.” This type of statement makes it easier for others to

hear what we have to say.

The most popular ways of expressing anger/annoyance are:

“Oh!” “How annoying!” “How infuriating!” “Isn’t that infuriating!”

“How maddening!” “What a nuisance!” “What a bore!” “Blast!”

“Why on earth should I do it?” “Who (the hell) do you think you are?”

“ How dare you!” “For heaven’s sake!”’ Oh God! Oh darn!/Oh hell!/

Damn!/ Damn it! That’s it! / That does it!” “ It drives me crazy.” “ It

really gets on my nerves.” “ It makes me angry.” “ It really annoys me

when ….” “I just can’t put up with it anymore.” “ It’s a disgrace!” “

It makes my blood boil!”

When the British are annoyed they often use short answers: “Yes” or

“No”.

The examples are categorized by the situation: informal, neutral, and

formal. Here they are:

Neutral: “I’m very annoyed …” “ Oh dear …/ Oh No!” “ What a nuisance!” “This really makes me cross/angry.” “ It annoys me.” “ It isn’t

very nice/pleasant.” “I really hate him.” 87

 

Informal: “Oh, hell. No!” “Oh damn!” “Oh no, what’s next?” “She makes

me mad.” “He really makes me see red.” “What an idiot!” “I can’t stand it

anymore.”

“I’m fed up with it.” “That’s the last straw.” “Why the hell didn’t he stop

calling me?” “I’ve had just about enough of this condition.”

Formal: ”This is extremely irritation.” “I can’t say I’m at all pleased ….”

“I’m extremely displeased / angry/ unhappy.” “I must say I reject to I will

not pull up with.” “I take great exception to.”

The possible responds to the expressions of irritation/annoying/ anger are:

- Yes, it is really annoying/irritating/awful/ridiculous etc.

- Yes, it gets on my nerves, too.

- That’s a fair point.

- Well, actually, I don’t mind it.

- It doesn’t really bother me.

 

When the British want to express their annoyance at another person’s

action they usually use the continuous form modified by “always”, “forever”. This form is considered to be an exception as it is used to express a

routine rather than an action occurring at a particular moment in time.

Examples:

“Martha is always getting into trouble.”

“Peter is forever asking tricky questions.”

“George was always being reprimanded by his teachers.”

Note that this form is generally used with the present or past continuous

(he is always doing/ they are always doing).

Normally the present perfect tense is not used with the question word

“when”. In the following sentence, however, this question word does not

refer to a specific point in the past, but rather “any” point in an incomplete

period of time.

Example:

“When have you ever done the dishes?” This use implies annoyance or

criticism.

 

DIALOGUES

Note the expressions used in the dialogue and the progression of the conversation. The dialogue can be used as a model to have similar conversations.

 

1. Grace: Why is there no water coming out when you turn on the faucet?

Henry: Not even a single drop?

Grace: Well, it’s just drip, drip, drip. But that’s still not water.

Henry: I don’t know. Since last night water pressure has dropped to little

more than a drip.

Grace: Did you call the department management yet?

Henry: Yeah. I called her this morning and she said she’d send someone

over.

Grace: But how long ago was it?

Henry: That was three hours ago!!!

Grace: That’s outrageous! I just don’t understand why they are not on top

of this.

 

2. A: Waiter! Will you show us the bill of fare?

B: Here you are, sir. And this is the wine list.

A: Well you may remove it as we are not going to take any drink. We are

driving, you know. We mean to have a snack and that’s all. Have you got

lobsters?

B: I’m sorry, sir, but they are not on the menu.

A: And what about salmon?

B: We have run out of it, sir.

A: What a nuisance! Well, what is that famous food you treat your customers to?

B: Chicken broth is our specialty, sir.

 

3. John: I’m sorry, Frank, I can’t seem to find that book you lent me. I

must have lost it.

Frank: Oh, no! Don’t say that! 89

 

John: But don’t worry. I’ll buy you another one.

Frank: Hell! That’s not the point, John. It wasn’t mine to lend in the first

place. I borrowed it from Tom.

John: Oh, I see. Well, I’m sorry but …

Frank: Oh, what a nuisance. It’s a fat lot of good being sorry now, isn’t it?

What on earth am I going to say to Tom?

 

4. Roger: So, how is your roommate?

Martha: She really turns me off.

Roger: What happened?

Martha: She’s always making loud noises at midnight and when I remind

her, she always makes rude remarks. I just can’t put up with it anymore.

Roger: Why don’t have a heart to heart chat with her?

Martha: I tried, but it didn’t work.

 

5. Nurse: Good morning, Mr. Baker.

Baker: Good morning, nurse.

Nurse: Have you an appointment?

Baker: No, I haven’t.

Nurse: Is it urgent?

Baker: I have a terrible toothache.

Nurse: Can you come at 10 a.m. on Monday?

Baker: For heaven’s sake! I want to see the dentist now, nurse.

Nurse: The dentist is very busy at the moment. Can wait till 2 p.m.?

Baker: Oh, God! I can wait, but my toothache can’t.

6. Nick: Hello, Alex!

Alex: Hello, Nick! How did you notice me in this crowd?

Nick: By chance, of course.

Alex: By lucky chance, I should say.

Nick: How annoying! Why should all the people come at the same time

and just to the same gate as we do.

Alex: Oh, yes. That angry crowd, how they push!

Nick: Well, let’s drop into the refreshment room first.

Alex: OK. 90

 

EXERCISES

 

I. Read the conversation and answer the questions given below:

A: Did you hear that flight CD 123 to London is delayed?

B: Oh, how annoying!

A: They say the time of departure will be announced in two hours.

B: It’s infuriating! I had to be in London by noon.

 

Questions:

1. Does the second passenger sound a bit nervous? 2. What would you do

if you were in his shoes? 3. What else could the passenger have said with

the same meaning? 4. In what way might the second passenger have responded?

II. Read the conversation and answer the questions given below.

Bob: Can I have a word with you for a minute, please?

Tom: Sure. What is it?

Bob: Well, it’s about your rubbish bin actually.

Tom: What’s the problem?

Bob: Well, I’m sorry to say this, but it stinks and I just can’t put up with it

any more.

Tom: It’s full of rubbish! What do you expect?

Bob: You could put your rubbish in a bag first; so it smells less. That’s

what I do.

Tom: But bin bags cost money! It doesn’t cost me anything to throw my

rubbish straight into the bin.

Bob: Yes. I appreciate that, but the smell is offensive and very annoying. It

drives me crazy!

Tom: I see. Sorry about that.

Bob: Also the smell attracts flies and other insects, so it could become a

health risk.

Tom: That’s a fair point. OK. I’ll use bin bags from now on.

Bob: Thanks. 91

 

Questions:

1. What is annoying Bob? 2. What is Tom’s reaction to Bob’s complaint?

3. What does Bob suggest as a solution? 4. What is Tom’s first reaction to

Bob’s suggestion? 5. How does Bob persuade Tom to do what he wants?

 

III. Read the conversation and answer the questions given below.

A: What a nuisance! I’ve been waiting twenty minutes for the bus. Do they

always take so long to come?

B: In the rush hours, yes, I’m afraid so. Is this the first time you’ve taken

it? I don’t remember you from other mornings.

A: Damn … the first time, yes, and the last, I hope. My car broke down

yesterday. If it weren’t for that I wouldn’t be here. Just my luck.

B: I used to take my car into town, but I gave that up a long time ago.

A: Oh! If there were more buses, I might go by bus. But the service is awful, and they always arrive full up. Isn’t that maddening?

 

Questions:

1. What terms are the speakers on? 2. Do you think the second speaker is

content with public transport facilities in his area? 3. Who of the speakers

is more annoyed? How else could the first speaker have expressed his annoyance? 4. Does the first speaker sound formal or informal? 5. And what

about the second one?

IV. What might you say if you …

1. couldn’t get into an overcrowded bus to get to the University on time;

2. lost your keys; 3. were late for the cinema; 4. burned the dinner; 5. broke

a new vase; 6. were late for the lecture because of a traffic jam; 7. got all

dirt over your jeans; 8. failed the exam in lexicology.

V. Fill in the missing phrases expressing irritation/annoyance/anger of the

speaker: 92

 

1._________________ This is the third time I’ve brought back the car to

get the windshield wiper fixed.

2._______________ This takes too much of my time; I just can’t wait anymore.

3._______________ I’m getting very annoyed about the whole situation.

4._______________ What I want is to get my order in time and not have to

come back again.

5. ______________ You are always interrupting me.

 

VI. Fill in the missing words.

1. Who do you … you are!? 2. It really gets … my nerves. 3. I just can’t

put … … it anymore. 4. It … me crazy. 5. It makes my blood …. 6. It really makes me see …. 7. She is always … into trouble. 8. How … you!

VII. Express your annoyance on finding yourself in the following situations:

1. You are woken up by noisy neighbors returning to their flat which is

near yours. You are annoyed. You open the door and speak to them.

2. You intended to go on holiday with a friend. At the last minute she/he

said she/he couldn’t go with you. It’s not the first time she/ he let you

down. You feel a bit annoyed.

3. Your brother is very lazy and always wants you to help with his homework. You don’t particularly like it. In fact you are a bit annoyed. One day

you decide you have had enough. What do you tell him?

4. You and your friend are in the restaurant. The waiter in the restaurant

doesn’t seem to notice you. Your friend is annoyed. What does he say?

5. Someone is playing a guitar in the street outside your window when you

want to go to sleep. You are annoyed. What do you say?

6. Your timetable for the next term is planned in such a way that you haven’t got a possibility to attend a fitness club. 93

 

UNIT 12