In the use of the dolls to form the persistent interest in kid to the meal, as in everything, you should know the measure.

 

It’s numerously you can find the situation where the whole family’s going to feed the baby. The mother, for example, brings a full spoon to the
child’s mouth, the father, the grandmother and the grandfather play the real puppet shows, if only the baby looked at it and lost his vigilance at some point, and the mother could send to him another spoon into his mouth. Of course, such the events are, and more three or four times a day, quite tedious. Is better to let the kid get hungry and give the right to choose what he wants to eat than to spend so much time and effort the only feeding alone?

The theatrical puppets are perfectly replaced with the ordinary toys. At the table together with your child, you can put his favourite toy, for example, the teddy bear or the doll. The process of feeding is built in two ways in this case. The empty plate’s placed in front of the toy, and either the kid is trying to “feed” your pet himself, or you bring the spoon to the child then the toy by turns. You should definitely praise the dish proposed to the baby, convincing him that, for example, the bear liked the porridge, so he asked you for more. Moreover, praise the child if he shows the independence and he tries to treat the toy himself. You can also invent the fun names for each dish with the older children.

The personal example of the parents is very important for the child in feeding. If you have a tradition for a lunch, a breakfast and a dinner – every gathering the whole family, don’t deprive the baby of the pleasure to sit and to eat with everyone. Seeing that, as the adults are happy to eat praising the mistress, he will probably pull to the spoon. On the other hand, never show him your dissatisfaction with one or another dish. Watching the face disgusted of his father and his mother, the kid will become to imitate them very soon, so do not be surprised if he will refuse to eat something one day that caused the negative reaction from the parents.

In other words, if you want the child to eat well and didn’t have a sharp aversion to a particular dish, first of all you must monitor your mood and the attitude to the food in general and one or another dish in particular. Only then, you’ll be able to develop the adequate reaction to any healthy food.

The aesthetic design of the food has the large importance. If the dish is served on the beautiful plate, decorated, and more emit surprisingly a delicious flavor, even without a proper appetite, the baby will certainly eat with pleasure all offered. But, the unattractive kind of the food, repulsive, and even more so the dirtier dishes can once and for all cause the aversion to the particular food in the kid. Therefore, each meal should be a holiday not only for the stomach, but also for any eyes.

Invite your child to set the table himself that is to roll the napkins nicely and arrange the devices properly. Moreover, you can organize the real surprise for your household together with your kid, making the various figures, the candy boxes and the vases out of origami-style paper, cutting out all kinds of the napkins from the paper coloured and using it to decorate the table. Surely, all these preparations will help your child tune into the meal upcoming, lift his mood and allow him to feel his importance, because he, as an adult, involved in the common case. Of course, you won’t be able to do such the holidays every day, but the memories of this event will remain in the memory of your kid for long, and his appetite’s improved greatly.

It’s already from the age of one and a half, the children are able to make their contribution to the preparation of the table for eating, carrying the unbreakable objects and the non-sharp instruments from the sideboard.

 

Be sure to praise your baby for the help he gives you. Then any meal will be painted for him in the tones – light and iridescent. In addition, if the baby will feel the respect and the support from the adults, he’ll be treated as an adult; he quickly lost the desire to act up. Moreover, with the normal self-esteem and the sense of the dignity, the kid usually doesn’t have any problems associated with the meal.

 

Probably, everyone knows the slogan: “When I am eating – I am deaf and dumb!” from the childhood. It is convenient to some extent because it eliminates the possibility of choking during the conversation when eating. However, it should be noted that our ancestors held a very different opinion. The meal was an extra reason for them to talk. This, on the one hand, allowed once again communicating with the family and the friends, tuning into the way of cherishing, on the other hand – excluded any haste. The food was chewed slowly for the conversation flowing smoothly. Perhap, that’s why people had less the digestive problems than they’re doing now, when any meal is almost done “on the run”.

Don’t rush your kid; don’t try as quickly as possible to push him a fair amount of all kinds of the food. Your common meal should be accompanied with the quiet conversation. Thus, the child is tuned to the food positively, because he can learn many interesting things from his families at this time and speak on the equal footing with the older members of the family. Be sure that such the meal will have the beneficial effect both on his digestion and on the psyche.

You can involve him in the direct preparation of the certain dishes for stimulating the baby’s interest in the food. Of course, you are unlikely to be able to trust the kid any complex operations in the kitchen, but he’s capable a feasible contribution to this difficult task. Therefore, the four-year-old baby can wash the potatoes perfectly, make a pie or cut a cookie shape. The main thing is to praise him for his diligence, even if he did not succeed something,
because the main thing is not the result, but his desire to help you and the preparation to the meal itself.

 

Of course, the active participation of the kid in the cooking can create many unnecessary problems for the mother or the grandmother. However, if you want your baby to have the good appetite and develop well, you’ll have to make some sacrifices. In addition, the child will get better and better every day that pretty soon you’ll get a great assistant in his face.

 

Thus, the temporary inconvenience can bring very effective results that are the good appetite of the baby, and his development accelerated, as the operations require the certain effort of will and the mental costs in the kitchen.

It’s already at the table, when all the representatives of the family will gather, you should pay the attention of attending to the fact that the child took the part in the preparation of the dish. The universal surprise and the praise will help him to feel his need and the importance. In addition, under the admiring glances of the relatives, he won’t be able to refuse to eat, in the preparation of which he participated himself.

It’s been observed long that the kid begins eating much better when learning the absorption of the food on its own. Perhaps, he’s just interested in mastering a new subject that is a spoon, as well as to some extent to join the world of the adults. Of course, this isn’t as easy as may seem to the adult, so in the first days after the baby learns to hold the spoon, the dirty clothes and the pieces of the food will probably be accompanied every feeding and scattered throughout the room.

Be patient, because of how quickly the baby will learn to eat on his or her own, and depends on his desire to eat all the food offered, and even his mental development.

 

The child should try his hand as soon as possible at this matter, because the faster he will pick up the spoon, the faster he will learn to use this device, the fewer problems you will have with the feeding. Yes, you’ll have to face the certain kind of the difficulties willy-nilly, but the results justify your expectations that are the appetite of the baby’s sure to improve.

 

As soon as the kid learns to eat his own dish for ten or fifteen minutes, you should generally refuse to feed him with the spoon. The parents don’t sometimes allow the baby to take the initiative, scared for the cleanliness of the house. And now he reaches two years of age and has the time to get used to the fact that he’s fed, he is suddenly handed the spoon and required eating on his own! Of course, this turn of the events creates many problems for him. The baby is capricious, rejecting the foodstuff with the spoon and loses the appetite. In the relationship of the child with his parents, there is the tension. In the most cases, this ends up that the mother or the father can’t stand again, and begin to feed the baby with the spoon. However, this should not do. If you missed the moment for one reason or another, when the kid reached for the spoon himself, still try to teach him to use the device. At first you may need to help your child carry the spoon to his or her mouth. The baby will gradually do the task better and better, and after some time he’ll be able to cope with the food on its own. Now when the child tries to eat himself, it’s very important for the parents to keep calm, patiently directing his hand, otherwise you can involuntarily inspire the aversion for this or that food to the kid with the sharp movements or the shout the kid.

 

Perhaps, the most effective way to keep the child’s appetite is carefully treat all his desires concerning the food, and do not interfere with him to determine what he wants. Even if he prefers any one dish and doesn’t touch another one at all, you should not sound the alarm; most likely, his tastes will change after some period. Your main task is to provide your baby with the food both varied and nutritious.

 

***

It is quite often the parents don’t know what to do when the baby stubbornly clenches his lips and turns from the food away offered to him. Many parents cannot stand and go to the violent methods, as a rule, leading to the fact that the child begins to feel the aversion to the certain kind of the food. Moreover, after that one can begin any problems associated with the psyche of the baby and his self-esteem.

I hope this publication will help you avoid such the troubles, indicate an acceptable way out of any difficult situation, one way or another related to the food. Your baby is certainly worthy of more than the constant threats and prodding, so try to find the key to your child that will allow you not to experience the problems with his feeding, having saved the time and the energy. The recommendations, presented in this book, will help you in the first place to get rid of the unnecessary worries, to reconsider your views on the process of the nutrition, as well as to find the means and the ways that would interest your baby in the meal, reduced or even eliminated the possibility of his aversion to the certain dishes.

 

 

Part 2

If the kid cries

 

WHY DOES THE BABY SOB?

Dear parents, first let us understand what is a baby’s weeping and what can be caused by, because only knowing this can change the behavior of the child.

Believe me crying is never gratuitous. At infants, there is the sobbing reflexively because of a feeling of hunger, the thirst, the urge to the natural departures and the desire to sleep. In the older children the crying signals any unpleasant, intolerable feeling reaching up to the state of the affect that is the acute anxiety, the fear, the irritation, the sadness and the anguish.

The various functions of the weeping is the whim, the protest, the request, the demand, the complaint (= the offense), the sobbing-signal, and the sobbing-discharge, all this together taken, constitute a complex psychological structure, a kind of the language.

The child’s crying is the unpleasant irritant for an outsider hearing. However a mother will always be able to catch the notes in it indicating what her baby wants. If the adults use any means to stop weeping, they risk not only increase the distance between themselves and the child, but also erect a real wall of the indifference and the misunderstanding.

However there are the children who shed the tears on every occasion that is hearing the screams and the loud voices experiencing the physical pain or entering into conflict with someone, sympathizing with a favourite character of the fairy tale or seeing a dead butterfly.

Crying is a strong mental experience, an emotional concussion occuring against the background of the preceding excitement or the inhibition. It can be the result of the tense discharge like the rain falling from an overflowed of the storm cloud. The relief experienced after the sobbing, to some extent, improves the mood and serves as a means of regulating emotional tone.

It is often the weepping arises as a way to attract the parental attention, as a kind of the request to help, intervene and resolve a particular problem. Thus, the child complains of the one who offended him, at the bad health, the pain and the inability to realize his desires. In the first years of the life, the crying child shows that he wants to eat, drink, relieve himself (= go to the toilet under himself) or that he is uncomfortable with the wet clothes. He still cannot speak so all his desires are expressed through the sobbing, attracting the attention of the parents. At last the baby learned to utter the individual words and would seem already he should express his desires with them, but he still cries and be capricious, when he wants something. This happens reflexively because some information laid in his subconscious about such the method fulfilling of the desires.

It happens that the child is accustomed to be calm and cheerful only in the presence of the adults. He feels comfortable only when someone is nearby, he is paid with the attention. If the baby does not find something to do and feels the need for the directing contact with the parents, he can begin to attract the attention of the adults with the tears whining and complaining. Of course, the communication means a lot for the child, and those parents, who pay the attention enough to it, do the right things. The psychologists have proved that the need for love is a fundamental human one. Its satisfaction is a necessary condition for the normal development of the child. Feeling your care and the attention, the child acquires so-called “the basic trust to the world”. He grows calmer not having any fears to be alone and can find something to do. If the basic trust is not formed, the child is forced to seek the attention of the adults with the tears, the cries, the whims, the disobedience and etc.

About the sixth weeks of the life in the evenings the baby begins to cry, writhe and show the signs of the illness. At the same time, he is clean, drank the water enough, he is not hot... This condition is called the evening anxiety. Thus, the child discharges the tension accumulated during the day. It is believed, this is a consequence of the newborn’s adaptation to the rhythms of the day and the night which disappears about to the third months of the life.

 

The irritability and the tearfulness can be associated with the fact that the baby’s teeth begin to cut. This is a very painful process that is the gums swell, scratch, hurt, the saliva runs strongly and the temperature rises up.

The crying of the child can be caused with the fear of the strangers which he is not able to express in the words. We often hear such the expressions: “Stop screaming, and then I will give you to an uncle!” or “You will push an aunt with your legs; she will take you with her!” in the street or in the transport.

Such the warnings mentioned above, make very strong impression, causing the fear on the children with the sensitive psyche and the vulnerable one, and the words of a stranger “Come on, come on, I will take him or her to myself!” and the panic from the prospect of spending a lifetime in the society with other people. After all that the kid takes everything said at face value. Such the threats can develop the persistent rejection of the strangers in the children, and they will feel free and at ease only in the familiar environment in the future, in the circle of the relatives and the friends.

The tears and the tantrums are sometimes the result of the overloading the baby’s experiences. When you go with him to the store, to the zoo, to the farm, walk in the park or ride on the carousel, remember that the large crowd of people and the noise can adversely affect the condition of the child.

It happens that the baby, when he does not want to go to bed, grizzles and cries. Such the crying is something like a bad habit, wean from which it is necessary gradually.

It occurs that the child cries because he faced something strange and incomprehensible. The kid is not yet able to find the explanations for many phenomena, so they cause the fear in him, and as the consequence he began to cry. The baby can see something unfamiliar and scary not only in the life, but also in a dream that is a nightmare was dreamt to the child can also cause the sobbing.