You can find contradictions in any language but not as many as in English. (English is a crazy language)

Primarily, it’s indispensable to say that English is the most widely spoken language in the history of our planet. This fact is not a marvel. Half of the world’s books are written in English, the majority of the international calls are made in English. 60% of the world radio programs, 70% of international mail use English as the paramount language.

Nonetheless, it is time to become aware of the fact that this widely used, pervasive language is a crazy language. English is extremely lavish with contradictions, with obscure words and word combinations. In the crazy English language blackboards can be blue or green, hot dogs can be cold, darkrooms can be lit, nightmares can take place in broad daylight, while daydreaming can take place at night, tomboys (a girl who likes playing the same games as boys) are girls, midwives (a specially trained nurse whose job is to help women when they are having a baby) can be men. In fact, a woman can man a situation, but a man can’t woman a situation, a man can father a movement, but a woman can’t mother one. In what other language a slim chance and a fat chance (used to say that something is very unlikely to happen) can be the same, “what’s going on?” and “what’s coming off?” be the same, and quite a lot and quite a few the same, while a wise man (n the New Testament of the Bible, three kings or wise men who came from the East, guided by a star, and brought gifts of gold) and a wise guy (an annoying person who thinks they know more than they really do) are opposites. What’s more, there is no butter in buttermilk, no grape in grapefruit, neither peas nor nuts in peanuts and no ham in a hamburger. To make matters worse French fries weren’t invented in France, English muffins (цукаты) in England. If we take the culinary, it transpires that sweetmeat is candy, while sweetbread, which is not sweet, is made from meat.

Let’s explore some more paradoxes and vagaries of English.

Just take a gander at (a male goose – look at sth) loads of familiar English words and phrases that turn out to mean the opposite of or smth very different from what we perceive they purport.

· Put on your shoes and socks. This is an exceedingly (extremely) difficult maneuver. Most of us put on our socks and then our shoes.

· Underwater and underground. Things that we claim are underwater and underground are obviously surrounded by water and ground, not under.

Isn’t it a real pretty kettle of fish!!!

It goes without saying that this inscrutable phenomenon of English often engenders a vortex of bad emotions in its speakers. Moreover, this downbeat, creepy story often jolts people out of their composure and even makes them feel ludicrous and vexatious because of being misled by comprehending this or that word in a wrong way. 

The truth as far as I elicit it is that there is only one solution that evinces in this case. If you crave to speak English but do not want to go ape (become very angry) every time people glare at you with surprise, then it is high time to fresh you up and get cracking начать действовать, взяться за дело). Without any doubt, it’s in your zeal to guard composure and go out of your way to commit to your memory as many words and phrases as possible. Obviously, it engenders to be an avalanche of work, but a bit later you will savour and relish the feeling of being a venerable high-flier in this stunningploy of language.

And of course, strive to marvel at the unique lunacy of the English language, in which we can make amends (to do smth to show you are sorry for hurting or upsetting sb) but never just one amend; to get jitters (a nervous, worried feeling, especially before an important event), get the willies (a nervous or frightened feeling). This whole business of plurals that don’t have matching singulars makes us strongly assume the fact that English is weird.

But still it’s used by at least one out of every seven human beings around the world.